Don't say please.

Don't say 'please'.
Don't say 'sorry'.
Do say 'thank you'.

In my early years parents held 'good manners' as the most important.
"Remember your manners."
" Say please and thank you"
"Say 'sorry' almost all the time.
When going to grandma's or to friends places it would be the way to show we were being brought up with proper values.
Two of these words are overrated!

Child. "Can I have an ice cream?"
Adult. "No."
Child. "Pleeease." (Has the child learnt that this will get him the ice cream.)

Adult. "Pick up those toys now .....please." (The 'please' weakens the request.)
Adult "I'm sorrrry but you must come inside now." (The 'sorry' weakens the reguest.)
"It's time now for the toys to go in the box." ( No one loses face.)

I challenged one of our student teachers to delete 'please and thank you' from her vocabulary.
She challenged me back with "What about 'Please pass me the salt'."?
Is the word 'please' derived from 'to plead'.?
I think no one should plead.
I think we can speak to each other respectfully in other ways.
"Would you kindly pass the salt."

We should however thank others for their kindnesses.
This is respectful, shows aroha and strengthens the sense of whanaungatanga in the centre.
But that is another topic for next time.